What you may have read about this movie on other, dare I say more “professional” sites, is probably true. A fun romp, if you ignore the sci-fi logic and enjoy it for what it is, the aforementioned fun romp. I can live with that. I had a good time watching this movie. As the script wasn’t terribly heavy on the dialogue, Bruce Willis and Joseph Gordon-Levitt were forced to let their respective charismas do much of the talking, and it worked. This movie was futuristic without being overly ridiculous, and both dudes fit into the fake world pretty seamlessly. I do have a “but,” though.

Or, a few. Firstly. The Rainmaker. Cute kid, except when he was screaming his cheeks off and levitating houses! Wow. I’m still not fully convinced that he wasn’t the even-younger version of Bruceph Gordon-Willvet. Though, as it was explained to me afterward, letting Emily Blunt live prevented this from happening. Which is fine. But the world in which they all existed, with access to the future and past, and with a sketchy business that dealt exclusively in traveling between the two, “eliminating impurities,” has to have caves that weren’t spelunked in the least. Even though the film was called Looper, the story didn’t come full circle. But maybe that’s okay. Maybe this film is one of the few that actually deserves a follow-up. Maybe it shouldn’t be in movie form, like the rest of the shite sequels out there, but instead serialized on television. Maybe J.J. Abrams could help Johnson re-imagine it. Maybe JGL should be on the small screen again. Maybe Bruce should have a steadier job. Maybe Emily Blunt should show off her solid American accent on a regular basis. Maybe I’m a sage. (You’re welcome, Hollywood.)

Secondly, and much more superficially, a quick Google search tells us that Joseph Gordon-Levitt wore all that makeup to look more like Bruce Willis. Bruce is the more recognizable face of the two, so they didn’t bother touching Die Hard and instead gave JGL a noticeably stiff upper lip. I wasn’t a huge fan of this, even though I supposed JGL did look an awful like Bruce, what with the gruffness and the lipness and the mannerisms. But I think JGL is a good enough actor to have pulled that off sans prosthetics. I would have believed him as the younger Bruce regardless. Also, WHY WOULD YOU MESS WITH THIS FACE?

Whatever. Lastly, I think Bruce Willis was great and everything–his performance was as subtle as it could have been, and he definitely let his ominous presence do most of the work, as I said before. But there was one bit of a scene that snapped me out of the movie and into what I imagined his contract negotiation would have been like. I pictured him sitting with Johnson and his agent, drawing up something, and Bruce saying, “There needs to be at least a 30-second shot of me holding two AK-47’s. I don’t care if the entire movie revolves around an antiquated gun called the ‘blunderbuss,’ guys. The American people expect me to double-fist two very dangerous automatic weapons, and I cannot let them down. Put it in the script.” Or, something along those lines.